WRESTLEMANIA FUCKING 17

WWF WRESTLEMANIA 17

Chris Jericho vs. William Regal
William Regal opening up WrestleMania = hell yeah, baby. And he sure kicked a lot of ass in this one. I thought that Jericho wasn't very interesting with his initial shine, which was some very generic babyface stuff (Jericho adding some of his vintage come on baybaaaays would've fit it so well), but after that was cut-off fairly quickly, we got a real awesome number w/ Regal in control, targeting Jericho's banged up left arm/shoulder. He is vicious, nasty & just extremely compelling with his onslaught. It's lovely to watch, and as a result, this match ends up being a damn good n' tight opener clocking in at just under 8 minutes. ***1/4

APA & Tazz vs. Right To Censor
This a real short match, and it's essentially nothing memorable. Very inoffensive though. Bradshaw's Clothesline is always nice. *

Big Show vs. Kane vs. Raven
This is a classic dumb-fun, straight out of a video game all-over-the-place brawl. So much fun from start to finish with them fighting all over the backstage area, people going through windows & walls, a golf cart chase, an epic finish. And the whole dynamic of Raven going against 2 giant-monster-people is awesome & its portrayed wonderfully. ***3/4

Eddie Guerrero vs. Test
They probably overdid The Radicalz involvement in the match considering how short it ended up being, but I thought it was all pretty amusing, so it didn't end up hurting the bout much at all. This was solid with it starting out a bit rough, but once Eddie took over (in a pretty fun & creative way might I add), it got better & remained good till the end. Most of it is thanks to Eddie who was an absolute stud in there, unsurprisingly. Test had a nice moment on the offense too with that explosive tilt-a-whirl. Solid stuff. ***

Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle
The mat-heavy action in the beginning is by far the best thing about this match. The thing actually started off pretty damn wonderfully with that-- they were telling a clear story with it, and it was unique & very compelling to watch. Once they drift away from that, I lose interest. It's not bad, but it's uninteresting & especially disappointing given the great start that this match had. Was a collection of moves & strikes pretty much, but with no charm or any hook to them. I'd say that the match is OK overall with the matwork carrying it. I also must mention that one thing which baffled me more than it probably should've is that the low-blow by Angle just before the finish wasn't treated as a big deal at all with Benoit barely selling it. **1/4

Chyna vs. Ivory
A 2-minute Chyna squash, innit. *

Shane McMahon vs. Vince McMahon
The storyline leading up to this is actually hilarious, and the way it reaches its apex in the closing moments of this match? Legitimately awesome stuff. Other than that great last few minutes, this match was alright. Obviously the punches don't look very good, but the brawling is solid enough & then there's your usual amusing big match Shane insanity. A pretty solid & entertaining overall package. **3/4

Edge & Christian vs. The Dudley Boyz vs. The Hardy Boyz
The most legendary pure ladder-spotfest of all-time. Features maybe the most legendary singular spot of a multi-man ladder match ever with Edge's Spear to Jeff, and alongside that, there's MANY other also totally-crazy moments. It's a fireworks show. The inclusion of Spike, Rhyno & Lita only added to the insanity. These kind of matches aren't exactly my cup of tea these days, especially because of how damn overdone this day & age, but this one truly stands the test of time. ****

Gimmick Battle Royal
Hearing Mean Gene & Heenan call this thing was awesome. The whole segment was really amusing & entertaining, and the duration for it all was pretty much perfect.

The Undertaker vs. Triple H
I have never really cared for this match, and that didn't change during this latest viewing of mine. Boring, uninteresting brawling from start till end, but I do like the sledgehammer spot when Taker went for the Last Ride. And you gotta respect the commitment to selling by the ref, brother. *1/2

Steve Austin vs. The Rock
Maybe the best pre-match video package of all-time, two of the biggest stars in the company, amazing atmosphere. When I think about a "WrestleMania Main Event", this is the match that would more than likely pop to my mind first. All the ingredients that I named help make this really a perfect package, and what happens inside that ring is also just superb. I love the energy right from the get go as Austin starts the fight by not letting Rock finish his entrance, and that energy stays there throughout the entire thing. It's simply amazing brawling with Austin delivering a phenomenal character performance. He really comes off as a man possessed from the start, and knowing the turn he takes at the end of the bout? It makes it all the more great, because it was the perfect lead-up for what was about to come. Hell, I even like the finisher stealing bits in this! In most cases, I think it comes off as so tryhard & corny, but it just all worked in THIS particular match between THESE particular people. This truly is a match that will never die. One of the finest to ever take place at WrestleMania, that's for sure. ****3/4